When drinking, do not mix your beverages! Because it results in a Party in the Stomach!
Okay so the way I learned this lesson was at a Christmas Party. Not my own companies either, which was even more disgraceful!
We are at the fancy restaurant which the company rented out for the night. I am having a drink of this and a drink of that, I am not really sure what all they were.
We sit down for a nice meal, and I realize things are not going right. I excuse myself to the ladies room and make it just in enough time to loose my meal. I was really glad there was no one in the restroom at the same time.
While standing in the powder room area fixing myself up to rejoin the party, still very drunk, in walks the girlfriend of one of my dates co-workers. She is not sober either and is complaining about the SMALL bonus that they guys get every year.
In my ever so graceful manner I say, "Well the boss man bought your man his first whore when he was 17, so it isn't aboout the end of the year bonus, it's about all the bonuses!"
I stumble back to the table only to discover that about 30 minutes has past, I stop drinking, and shortly thereafter we head home. I slur my great thanks to the wonderment that was our nanny, and go to bed.
The next morning, our phones have about 10 angry voice mail messages mainly from the co-worker and his girlfriend, complaining about how I can't hold my liquor and blab about long term secrets.
I figured if you are going to sleep with a man whore (AKA Roadie), you would think you would be prepared for his past!
Anyway, then the next work day my date is told that I am not welcome at the next company party. OUCH!
Well I ended up being allowed at the next company Christmas party, but for sure stayed sober this time. I had learned my lesson and was not going to be the biggest offender.
Of course the biggest offender that next year was way worse than me! During the bosses annual speech, as he introduced the newest accountant, an actual employee stood up and screamed,
Thank you Hop Sing! I am off the hook!